I visited a home for pregnant and parenting teen mothers tonight. I offered to talk to them as a working, pregnant mother to perhaps give them some advice or serve as a role model. It was an interesting experience.
These girls are fairly successful as far as being teen mothers goes. They are raising their children in a healthy environment and going to school. Many other teen mothers don't do as well. But, they also seemed so different from how I was in high school. One didn't realize that it cost money to go to college. Another wanted to be a psychologist like the people on "SVU." As I was talking to them they seemed like such children even as they bounced their own children on their knee.
They asked me about my job, and I told them honestly it's not a job I recommend to most people. My salary started so painfully low that I had to lean on my parents to help me move and to buy furniture for my tiny apartment. I am doing well now, but I would have been screwed if I was supporting a baby and had no parental backing! These girls start with the deck stacked against them.
One asked if I had a lot of debt from college. I answered sort of sheepishly that my parents had paid for me to go, but that these girls had many options for grants, scholarships and loans. One girl told the other one that they could apply for a grant as a teen mom and also because both had lived in foster care. What different lives! I can't even imagine. I am sort of embarassed of all the advantages I have had. I am glad I didn't completely squander my opportunities though.
I don't know if they got much out of the little meeting tonight. They were busy talking about what to get their boyfriends for Valentine's Day, checking text messages, and showing off a new pair of stilettos. I did tell them that they impress me very much and that seemed to mean a lot.
--MM
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Monday, February 11, 2008
Sad news
A neat story I did last month did not end quite how I hoped. I was assigned to do a story on senior citizen couples who could provide lessons in love. One couple I profiled was married for 72 years and have known each other since they were in elementary school. The others were newlyweds at the ages of 89 and 90.
Both couples were extraordinary, still deeply in love, holding each others' hands and looking dreamily at each other. The story turned out to be very touching and sweet. It was set to air this Thursday on Valentine's Day.
Then today, we got a message that the 90-year-old newlywed had died. They had only been married a month. How depressing. T called the widow to see how she felt about us still airing the story as a tribute to their love. She agreed and said she "had lost the love of her life." I am glad she doesn't mind sharing their story, though I imagine it will be painful to watch.
The news put a damper on my day. I have the hardest time shaking depressing thoughts like that. They just kind of cloud my thinking and bring me down. My poor, fragile hormone-washed brain can't take this kind of thing!
--MM
Both couples were extraordinary, still deeply in love, holding each others' hands and looking dreamily at each other. The story turned out to be very touching and sweet. It was set to air this Thursday on Valentine's Day.
Then today, we got a message that the 90-year-old newlywed had died. They had only been married a month. How depressing. T called the widow to see how she felt about us still airing the story as a tribute to their love. She agreed and said she "had lost the love of her life." I am glad she doesn't mind sharing their story, though I imagine it will be painful to watch.
The news put a damper on my day. I have the hardest time shaking depressing thoughts like that. They just kind of cloud my thinking and bring me down. My poor, fragile hormone-washed brain can't take this kind of thing!
--MM
Friday, February 8, 2008
Child care heaven and BPA hell
I have been on time or even early every day this week. It is some kind of miracle. My frazzled existence from before has just evaporated. Our new child care arrangement is working beautifully. Our child care provider arrives with her little son shortly after 2:00 p.m. and after we chat a bit, I leave and get to work by 2:30.
If Q is napping, I can let him sleep instead of jarring him awake, slapping a clean diaper on him, and throwing him in his car seat for the race across town. If he is having a late snack, he can peacefully eat in his chair when I leave. My usual 30-minute drive to day care and then work is now a straight eight-minute shot to the station. Before, lights, construction, or chatty neighbors could easily slow me down, but now I am out the door and walking into work with little stress.
The miracle of it all, is that this arrangement is actually cheaper. Why didn't we do this before? They go to the park or to the mall playground and on walks. Q seems to get a lot of individual attention. A part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop. Will she change her mind? Will we be left in the lurch? I guess we'll worry about that when the time comes.
A recent report has me worried about plastic baby bottles and the chemicals they leach into milk. I searched online for BPA-free bottles and found them either sold out or very expensive. So much to worry about, so little time.
--MM
If Q is napping, I can let him sleep instead of jarring him awake, slapping a clean diaper on him, and throwing him in his car seat for the race across town. If he is having a late snack, he can peacefully eat in his chair when I leave. My usual 30-minute drive to day care and then work is now a straight eight-minute shot to the station. Before, lights, construction, or chatty neighbors could easily slow me down, but now I am out the door and walking into work with little stress.
The miracle of it all, is that this arrangement is actually cheaper. Why didn't we do this before? They go to the park or to the mall playground and on walks. Q seems to get a lot of individual attention. A part of me is waiting for the other shoe to drop. Will she change her mind? Will we be left in the lurch? I guess we'll worry about that when the time comes.
A recent report has me worried about plastic baby bottles and the chemicals they leach into milk. I searched online for BPA-free bottles and found them either sold out or very expensive. So much to worry about, so little time.
--MM
Baby drama
Q has become quite the little drama baby. In the short time I was home for dinner tonight, he had several mini-meltdowns. One when the dog stole the bib he was playing with, another when I wanted him out of the pantry, and a third when he wanted his loud toy bus.They are kind of funny really. When something has displeased him, he stops in his tracks, starts with a small, quiet cry, and then squeezes his eyes shut and builds up to a wail. His reaction is so out of proportion with his perceived injustice.
Tonight after I rudely closed the door to the pantry, he started screaming and went to his daddy for support. T dutifully ignored him and went about his business, till Q realized his performance was fruitless.
Our Early Childhood educator says when he does this, we should calmly say, "I can see you are mad right now, but Mama needs to close the pantry." And then just ignore him. Easier said than done of course, but mostly his drama just makes me smile. At home that is. Public meltdowns are a different story.
--MM
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Doctor's visit madness
How do people with five children do it? I just don't understand.
I had an obgyn appointment today and had to take Q along with me. I waited for an hour for my appointment that was supposed to be at 9:40. How do you get that behind that early? T came by to help me for awhile, but then he had to go to work. Why do I even try to get there on time? I might as well just roll in half an hour late.
As I was in the stirrups, Q was bopping around pulling out magazines. When I was scheduling my next appointment, he threw a plastic frog behind the desk and ran off to explore other offices. At my ultrasound, he opened the door while I was in my underwear and carried around a urine sample cup. He took a piece off the toilet to play with and then found a stirrup cover to occupy his time. He screamed as I tried to wrestle it away. Eventually he was so exhausted from all the badness, that he laid on the ground on top of his stuffed seal. "Is he always this good?" asked the ultrasound tech as he lay there peacefully after his rampage. What??!!
The medicine they gave me to soothe my contractions is often prescribed for high blood pressure. My blood pressure is already on the low side, so I didn't like the sound of that. I have been feeling a bit light-headed lately as a result. Today the nurse measured my blood pressure at 88/58. It was probably even elevated slightly because Q was stressing me out. She asked if I was still actually alive. Great, huh? The doctor decided to half my dose, though I swear my contractions aren't easing up at all anyway.
Other than that, everything looked right on track, and I am not showing any signs of premature labor. I don't want the craziness of two babies to get here any sooner than it has to.
--MM
I had an obgyn appointment today and had to take Q along with me. I waited for an hour for my appointment that was supposed to be at 9:40. How do you get that behind that early? T came by to help me for awhile, but then he had to go to work. Why do I even try to get there on time? I might as well just roll in half an hour late.
As I was in the stirrups, Q was bopping around pulling out magazines. When I was scheduling my next appointment, he threw a plastic frog behind the desk and ran off to explore other offices. At my ultrasound, he opened the door while I was in my underwear and carried around a urine sample cup. He took a piece off the toilet to play with and then found a stirrup cover to occupy his time. He screamed as I tried to wrestle it away. Eventually he was so exhausted from all the badness, that he laid on the ground on top of his stuffed seal. "Is he always this good?" asked the ultrasound tech as he lay there peacefully after his rampage. What??!!
The medicine they gave me to soothe my contractions is often prescribed for high blood pressure. My blood pressure is already on the low side, so I didn't like the sound of that. I have been feeling a bit light-headed lately as a result. Today the nurse measured my blood pressure at 88/58. It was probably even elevated slightly because Q was stressing me out. She asked if I was still actually alive. Great, huh? The doctor decided to half my dose, though I swear my contractions aren't easing up at all anyway.
Other than that, everything looked right on track, and I am not showing any signs of premature labor. I don't want the craziness of two babies to get here any sooner than it has to.
--MM
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Slowing down
Things are settling down in my world after a few hectic days. T and I had a family friend come over Sunday night to watch Q and then dropped Ruby off at another friend's house. We then headed north to the state capital. We arrived at 7:30, got a bite to eat, and went to bed.
The next day was a looooong day of covering the legislative session. I felt a little light-headed a few times and had to sit down. Not a good sign. It was a fun day, especially since T and I rarely get to work together like that any more. We had some technical issues late in the day trying to get our live shots working and get our material fed back. That was extremely frustrating, but we did the best we could on our end, and that's all you can really do.
We drove back Monday night and arrived just before 11. I then had to work on my story for the next day, so it was a late night. My back was hurting and my eyelids were heavy by 1:45 a.m.
Then this morning was swimming lessons. It was a monumental effort to pull my suit on and get out the door with a squirmy little boy.
T and I really missed Q. It was weird not to have him in the car and toddling around our motel room and throwing food in the restaurant. When we got home, I had to ease him up out of his crib and squeeze him and smell his baby smell. This afternoon he was ridiculously cute insisting on wearing a stalking cap and paging through upside-down books.
We started with our new child care provider in our home today, and though it is always a bit awkward on that first day, it was wonderful to drive eight minutes to work instead of across town. T and I also drove straight home for dinner, cutting a huge amount of drive time out of our day. Anything to make the day less hectic is good for me.
We are listening tonight to the Super Tuesday results and monitoring them online. A guy I work with is from Egypt and just became a citizen a year and a half ago. This will be his first election to vote. He is fascinated by the process and asks many questions. It is interesting to find out just how much you really don't understand. Why do some states have caucuses and others primaries? Which are winner-take-all and which divide their delegates? When will a nominee be chosen? It demonstrates how complicated and crazy the process is. There must be an easier way. But, seeing him excited and enthusiastic about it makes me appreciate the madness a bit more.
--MM
The next day was a looooong day of covering the legislative session. I felt a little light-headed a few times and had to sit down. Not a good sign. It was a fun day, especially since T and I rarely get to work together like that any more. We had some technical issues late in the day trying to get our live shots working and get our material fed back. That was extremely frustrating, but we did the best we could on our end, and that's all you can really do.
We drove back Monday night and arrived just before 11. I then had to work on my story for the next day, so it was a late night. My back was hurting and my eyelids were heavy by 1:45 a.m.
Then this morning was swimming lessons. It was a monumental effort to pull my suit on and get out the door with a squirmy little boy.
T and I really missed Q. It was weird not to have him in the car and toddling around our motel room and throwing food in the restaurant. When we got home, I had to ease him up out of his crib and squeeze him and smell his baby smell. This afternoon he was ridiculously cute insisting on wearing a stalking cap and paging through upside-down books.
We started with our new child care provider in our home today, and though it is always a bit awkward on that first day, it was wonderful to drive eight minutes to work instead of across town. T and I also drove straight home for dinner, cutting a huge amount of drive time out of our day. Anything to make the day less hectic is good for me.
We are listening tonight to the Super Tuesday results and monitoring them online. A guy I work with is from Egypt and just became a citizen a year and a half ago. This will be his first election to vote. He is fascinated by the process and asks many questions. It is interesting to find out just how much you really don't understand. Why do some states have caucuses and others primaries? Which are winner-take-all and which divide their delegates? When will a nominee be chosen? It demonstrates how complicated and crazy the process is. There must be an easier way. But, seeing him excited and enthusiastic about it makes me appreciate the madness a bit more.
--MM
Friday, February 1, 2008
Painful changes
Next week we switch to our new daycare provider. I was surprised how sad it made me to say goodbye today. I am not even overly attached to our current one, but I just know she must feel a bond with Q. He is a happy, sweet little guy, and she has had him almost every day since he was a newborn.
T picked up Q tonight for the last time, and he said she hugged and kissed Q and said it was so hard to say goodbye. Such a bummer. I know some parents can just change providers at the drop of a hat without even thinking about it, but it sure has been hard for me. I just hope we are making the right decision. The good thing is, we are leaving on entirely pleasant terms and could always go back. She also said she would be available for drop-in care which is a nice option to have. Sigh. I hate change.
This weekend, T and I are taking a rare business trip to the state capital to cover a legislative session. A family friend will come to the house to spend the night with Q. We are leaving Sunday right at the start of the Super Bowl, so I will be lucky enough to listen to it on the radio for the entire four hours. Can't wait.
--MM
T picked up Q tonight for the last time, and he said she hugged and kissed Q and said it was so hard to say goodbye. Such a bummer. I know some parents can just change providers at the drop of a hat without even thinking about it, but it sure has been hard for me. I just hope we are making the right decision. The good thing is, we are leaving on entirely pleasant terms and could always go back. She also said she would be available for drop-in care which is a nice option to have. Sigh. I hate change.
This weekend, T and I are taking a rare business trip to the state capital to cover a legislative session. A family friend will come to the house to spend the night with Q. We are leaving Sunday right at the start of the Super Bowl, so I will be lucky enough to listen to it on the radio for the entire four hours. Can't wait.
--MM
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