Old friends, different lives

I had a bit of a frustrating weekend. My freshman year college roommate was scheduled to come into town Saturday afternoon. We were going to go a to a winery, get dinner, spend the night at our place, and then get brunch Sunday morning. She called about the time she was supposed to be arriving to say she hadn't left her previous stop, because she had food poisoning. She would try to sleep it off and maybe meet us for dinner. T and I waited around, not sure what to do with our day. My friend eventually called later that night to say she wouldn't make it at all that day. She would aim for lunch the next day. I felt like Saturday was sort of a waste. I got a huge plate of nachos and felt better.

So, the next day, again we weren't sure how to go about our day. When would long-lost friend arrive? I decided to go for a 5-mile run regardless. I run pretty slow right now as to not overexert myself, but I felt great and very satisfied. It was such a mild, sunny day.

We finally got word she would arrive after 1:30. So, lunch was out, but we managed to hit a winery and get a late afternoon snack before she left at 5:30. Pretty disappointing for a once very close friend you haven't seen in seven years.

I pulled out a photo album while she was here and we looked at old pictures of ourselves when we were so similar. We had the same dorm room, the same major, the same interests, we dyed our hair together, and ordered these cheesy bread sticks from the pizza place. Now, our lives are vastly different. She arrived at our home with her fresh-out-of-college boyfriend, though we earned our degrees seven years ago. She never stays in one place for more than six months and doesn't even own a bed. I own a house, two cars, am married, with one baby and another on the way. I felt so much older than her! She seems to really be looking for something. She said commitment and permanence scare her, so she constantly travels and takes temporary jobs. She just finished five months on a cruise ship and is now off to backpack in Southeast Asia with this new baby boyfriend. On the one hand it seems exciting to me, and I am envious that that opportunity is not remotely in my realm of possibility. But, on the other much bigger hand, I am glad I have found most of what I am looking for in my current home and in my family. Her spontaneity is probably fun in many ways, but it is also awfully frustrating when you have set aside a weekend and are left waiting by the phone.

I spent a lot of time in college and right after kind of floundering around, not knowing where I would land. But, I feel remarkably content right now. I feel like I am where I should be. It was nice in many ways to see my old friend and laugh at old memories. It is remarkable how different our lives have become. I am so happy to know her but realize I am also happy my life has taken a different, more stable path.

--MM